Opening my Eyes via Automatic Doors.

bwodabek
Jul 31, 2015
3 min read

It's easy to say that one has compassion for others, of course we do, we're not serial killers so of course we have compassion. But compassion and a true understanding are two different things I quickly found out. Post surgery recovery has not only meant learning how to walk again, but it also has been about finding the simple things I couldn't do any longer- which didn't even occur to me. Within 5 days of surgery my bathroom was equipped with a plastic shower bench, a handheld shower head and a bench to hold my leg as I attempted to shower. I was in a straight leg cast for a full month, logically you think 'oh my leg is just straight, I'll still be able to fit into a car, I'll just need to adjust a bit-' NOPE. In order to actually fit into a car I had to push the passenger seat all the way back, flatten the back and then sit halfway up the back of the seat; and of course grabbing onto the 'oh crap handle' because a putting on a seatbelt was out of the question. A month of this charade of trial and error I thought we had figured it out. We had adjusted for things that we didn't expect and anticipated those we foresaw. The whole game changed when I began to become more mobile. Walking with crutches is an effort- ask anyone...actually ask someone who's actually had to use them before because if you ask someone who's never needed them they'll tell you they are so much fun. No one wants to do a full body workout as soon as they wake up just to go to the bathroom. But once again we adjusted and got a handle on things- and then I got out into the real world. I always had compassion and sympathy for those with disabilities, but until you are someone who relies on ramps and automated doors you don't truly understand. Labeling a washroom is wheelchair accessible is great....until you're on crutches and you can't hold the bathroom door open long enough to hobble through it. Then, once through I noticed that the toilet was placed about 5 inches from the wall- which is a nightmare for someone who can't bend their knee. And riddle me this Batman, how does one pull open a heavy door (without falling), hold it (without hands) and hobble through on crutches (without it closing on you)- it will take you at least 8 tries that's for damn sure. Everything I used to take for granted I dreaded. I couldn't just run into the store and grab snacks for our girls night, I couldn't eat lunch upstairs at work because of said stairs and I couldn't sit in a normal chair for more than 5 minutes without excruciating pain. I'm finally off crutches and I'm so grateful. But of course I'm slowly forgetting how difficult it had been. I only had to go through that for 7 weeks, but the people that deal with that on a daily basis are the real champions. It was psychically and emotionally exhausting. I was tired of being tired, I was tired of worrying if we couldn't park close enough to the door, I was tired of needing help. This experience has opened my eyes to the everyday struggle some have to go though and I am so grateful for that, but I am also grateful I am past this. Of course I will never truly understand what they go through as even through all this- I knew there was an end. However how long, however painful, I knew that one day this would be behind me and I would be able once again. So next time, hold the door for someone, it goes a long way- longer than you realize. I am far from fully recovered but I'm closer than I was yesterday and the day before that. It's been a rough road but paved compared to those who do this everyday. Stay kind, Brianna